Thursday, June 17, 2010

Why I believe in breathing

The road has been unbearable many times. Many times I have lived under the expectation of others, so eager to please that I forgot what pleased me. Many times I have reached out because Love commanded me to do so. You see the understanding of Love has been the mission of my life. As a young boy I easily understood the power of Love when it comes to wholly transform a situation. Love and tenderness made a little defenseless asthmatic child be able to feel safe enough in this world to dare to take the next full inhalation of oxygen without fearing asphyxia. My beloved mother and paternal grandmother loved me relentlessly, with such overflowing love day and night. Sitting next to me in the wee hours of the morning, watching me tenderly grasp for air as the sun came up. Through their love I found my breathing rhythm again. This memory bring tears of joy to my eyes, because I realize that Love conquers everything, it transforms everything, it gives clean and pure oxygen to the ravished soul.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

To collect again is to recollect

glitter in my eyes
after touching the Christmas ornaments.
I became, for a short while, magical.
I was 4
I was blond
I had a warm and soft body
that moved fast and clumsily.
It was then that I first experience music,
a little portable phonograph
playing "American Patrol."

Tuesday, June 8, 2010


I believe we are constantly transforming, developing, changing. I am such a different person from who I was 18 months ago. Life, and its consequences, has a funny way of getting inside me. I am always searching for all the angles, different perspectives. Sometimes I take myself on a journey to a town called exhaustion. My dreamland reconnects me with my origin. My dreamland has nothing to do with me sleeping. It a sort of daydreaming reality that is far more vivid and deep in meaning than any alpha state experience. In my childhood I called this land Rotcehland , an ancient sounding name, an island kingdom between Iceland and Greenland. Politically diverse, more than 26 different languages spoken. A balmy southern island, Paalme; and a frigid north , Kuensalia. I have been the king of this dreamland.
There are days when my sadness takes me to a western beach in Rotcehland, there I sit with Pretzel and think of God protecting me. Or is it Mother Tara protecting me? Maybe the Universe or the Force, it does not matter who.
Lately I've met many people worried about loosing in the game of life. Life is not a game. Refuse to compete, it's barbaric, inhuman. I do not even want to compete. Compete against who? Nobody ever wins. It is forbidden to compete in the Kingdom of Rotcehland. I have declared it so.
Why do we diminish ourselves so?
Today I am thinking of the word DIGNITY, your worth, your reality. Be your bold self, refuse to play any games where fun is nowhere to be seen.
I just received a parcel from the Royal Rotcehlandish Post Service: Flowers for you!