Sunday, June 28, 2009

A Rainbow of Possibilities


I just came back form the Million Gay March in Dallas. The heat was incredible, around 105 degrees. As I marched, I thought of all those who marched for equal rights for the last 40 years. Four decades ago riots broke in Greenwich Village, New York after a gay bar was raided by the police. This has been identified as the starting point for the struggle for equality for Gay, Lesbian, Bi-Sexual and transgendered people in the United States. The rainbow flag, symbol of the diversity in our community, was flying high and proud today. We are not celebrating our sexual identity or orientation. We celebrate the fact that we have chosen freedom over persecution, dignity over oppression and Love above all. May future generations never have to struggle and suffer in order to embrace who they really are, human beings, loving beings. I say Amen to that!

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Suddenly This Summer.


Just came back from the library. I have been doing research on alternative career paths. To tell you the truth, it is actually a lot of fun. You must make a good assessment of your skills and your style of performing in the workplace. Is what they call a "holistic" assessment. The human mind is an amazing instrument. It can forget so easily. By thinking hard about all the tasks I have performed in my professional career and listing them I have made myself aware that I tend to forget how efficient and thorough I have been on my different jobs. Listing all my previous experiences and how I used my ability to analyze, synthesize, communicate made me feel better automatically. How could I have forgotten my ability to be tactful and diplomatic when explaining a difficult situation to my fellow co-workers.? How could I have forgotten about the time when I worked for two months successfully trying to sort out a contract dispute between photographers and a publishing company? I always felt I was handicapped because I have held more than 15 different jobs and because I speak English with a Spanish accent. These "handicaps" were hidden talents. On one hand I am highly adaptable to any job situation, on the other I have a unique bi-cultural perspective. How could I've been so blind?
I hope I can maintain the vision, the "I am a success" vision and not get sidetracked by dreadful comparisons to other people with different circumstances. Or sidetracked by the limiting impositions of my mind that expects to achieve, achieve and achieve without rhyme nor reason. Frustration should be seen as a pink flag ( we do not have red flags at the ranch) warning you to change your perspective in order to see the truth of the matter. In the meantime I breathe and do my homework.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Quietly, I cry


Damn Fear!!!! It has ruled my life, it has ruined my life, do not take me wrong, I am a courageous kind of guy. But fear, if I only understood you completely, if only I knew the antidote...It has been said time and time again that Love is the antidote.

Hail Love!!!! It has ruled my life, it has constructed my life, do not take me wrong, I am a courageous kind of guy. But Love, If I could only understood you completely, if only I knew how to make you appear in my life instantly....It has been said...

Mindful debates in times of financial desperation.

I want to scream, I am so frustrated. But I also want to sing and dance and laugh. And hug friends.

I am trembling with anxiety. I wish I could see my mother again. She died last year. I'll tell her all about my predicaments, my sorrows and my joys. Her loss is like a dagger through my heart. Yet, I believe in Love, in tenderness, in goodwill, in peace and in kindness. I do not have to understand everything, do I?

Pretzel, my dog, rushes up to me. In a swift move he jumps on my lap and starts licking up my teary cheeks.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

This is my mountain and I' m climbing it


Hot wind blowing from the south, the heat index is at 105 degrees Fahrenheit in the fair city of Dallas, Texas. Have you ever stuck your head in the oven to see if the roast is ready.?It is that hot but no roast at sight. I decided to made some fresh salmon with pink mashed potatoes (just add a small amount of beets until it takes the exact hue of pink you desire.) It's one of those times when you have 7 books you want to read and cannot make your mind which one to read first. It is one of those times when you change your mind every other second. I have too much time on my hands, I guess. Something I would..oops the dog is throwing up, I must go.

OK, I'm back, the salmon is almost ready, I have yet to clean the rug with Pretzel's "return of food." But I must finish this brief post with a final thought, rather a quote from an unknown person, at least to me: If the mountain was smooth you couldn't climb it. So we all need friction, traction, good hiking boots, roughness and whole lotta faith if we going to get from here to there. I feel anxious, it is no use denying it. But I have chosen my path, up the mountain. I have never thought of myself conventional or even rational to tell the truth. But it is all about YOUR TRUTH, the one I discovered, the one that was revealed to me while I wandered through life. Yes, I live in the steep mountain. Sometimes I just get tired of the difficult climb, but the view from here is breathtaking, its majestic, glorious and full of Love.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Slippery Sleep


I have been sleeping all day long. I have a vivid imagination. So I have been fantasizing about living in a place where there is no unemployment and where people can earn their living by being creative and dynamic. Some people manage to live their dreams. I'm still trying to figure it out. The artist in me wants to come out permanently. But I keep pushing it back, afraid I will not be "good enough" to earn a living doing what I want. I'm being sincere. I wish I could resolve the paradoxical equation that is up in my mind. The world has always yelled "do what makes you happy" at me. The same world has also yelled "but you should choose a career that offers you stability and financial support." Today I feel I'm still 18 and trying to figure things out. But life is a funny business. It's complex and compromises must be made. Today I am oversleeping, not wanting to get up, I suppose. It's a temporary thing. My mind needs a little bit of rest and pampering. But I must get balance and structure back in my life soon. I would have never expected life was going to be like this when I was growing up. It seems to me that when I was younger I really thought life was something you earned as reward for your effort. I am little bit older now and I believe you are the creator of your life and as you create you are prone to make mistakes, have second thoughts and learn throughout the process. To nurture your wounded soul you need not to treat it as a little defenseless baby but as a human being that needs to filter out the negative and let the positive set in. I have been oversleeping today, like a little baby. It's time to call the architect within and get going with those blueprints.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Old Objects, New Life




Could anxiety be a trumpet sounding off for you to pay attention to the important and forget about unimportant details? Well I'm having a wind ensemble orchestra inside my head lately. It's just the Unemployment Jitterbug. This afternoon I watch a rerun of Antique Roadshow (PBS version) and got all inspired about finding more about all the little objet d'art I have collected inside my brain for the last 20+ years. I cannot possibly afford what I want. I do not even think if I had the money I would buy that many antiques. I am thrilled by the stories behind the objects. It's a little bit of an answer to the philosophical Ubi sunt? (Where are they?). Antiques are proof that the past existed, really existed and had function and aesthetics working together for the common good. An Émile Gallé vase, a Philadelphia highboy, a Hokusai woodblock print they all constitute a legacy of beauty or at least the search for beauty. I like simple elegance. It has nothing to do with status symbol. Elegance is a respite from the fast and furious pace of modernity. It is a streamlined marriage between function and form. Antiques remind me of this union. Quietly watching this show calm my anxieties because I am focusing on the ability of us human to create beauty and to present it as a higher accomplishment.

Friday, June 5, 2009

The League of Clueless Impulsive Superheroes

Well it is time to move on, or at least keep moving. I need some little pampering; better, I need creative healing. I went down to Michael's and bought myself a sketchbook, a set of Staedtler's fine liner markers in assorted colors, color pencils and a black fine tip sharpie. Yes, I can be THAT wild and reckless. I then went to Barnes & Nobles, (I always call it Darns & Bubbles, for no exact reason) and bought two books. One is the quintessential job hunting bible What Color Is Your Parachute? 2009 by Richard N. Bolles. I have read this book about four times since the early 80's. It is the best ever. It is a translator of skills. Let me explain, the book helps you identify and label skills you didn't know you even had. it is a true and reliable job hunting compass. It is the original morph book. You can easily morph into many rewarding careers using the skills and experience you already have. The other book I bought was Juicy Pens Thirsty Paper by SARK. I have been a fan of this succulent San Francisco based Artist/Writer/Philosopher/Woman that run with the wolves or just rides on the cable cars genius. I love her as if I knew her. This is a must to have if you want to re-energize your creative juices. Let them flow, baby! So I am drawing, reading, drinking more coffee than usual, walking with Pretzel and eating fruit (I just bought the most delicious nectarines in Whole Foods on Lemmon Ave. They tingled with sweetness, it was an erotic experience)
Later last night I went to Starbucks and sat with my quadruple shot latte with 19 Splendas (Yes. I am exaggerating.) Pull out my magic markers and started doodling. It occurred to me to call myself the Shameless Doodler. We need superheroes these days. So I became one. I started doodling left and right, choosing colors like a demon possessed Pollock. People stared, I could not care less, I was on a mission to save the planet. Extravagant doodles and swirls started to appear on the blank pages. Green lines intersecting turquoise stars. Little pink suns with brown sunglasses. Strange looking castles and sketchy acanthus leaves.
Suddenly the door opened, it was a vision to behold. A middle aged woman came in holding an oversize uncompleted afghan. She was wearing a shirt that said Fearless in fluorescent green letters. She sat down at a table and started to knit. It was no other than the Fearless Knitter a most needed super hero. I am not making this up, I swear. The superheroes started manifesting themselves. Soon enough Caffeine Java Man was making the rounds offering us little sips of caffé macchiato. The League of Clueless Impulsive Heroes came to be.
Life has its ups and downs. It always has and always will. I have suffered from anxiety and depression most of my life. I have been told time and time again that I am TOO sensitive. I tell them- "No!- I am MORE sensitive" If we really take time to listen to our inner selves we can really understand that we are unique individuals. It is useless and painful to compare yourself to others. You will suffer excessively if you define yourself by others. I just took my frustration dealing with the loss of a potential good job and transformed it to something positive and creative. Energy is transferable. Hatred can become compassion, frustration can become creativity. You are using exactly the same energy. You choose.

A wish: I wish I can use my energy and talents in a creative and dynamic career that benefit people in wonderful and miraculous ways. This is my affirmation for today.




Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Yesterday I Had A Cow, Today The Cow Is Dead.


I'll be brief. I called this morning to explain my situation about taken the wrong test. I invested time and money these past 4 months trying to get into the Alternative Certification Program for the Dallas ISD. I have spent at least $300 dollars in application fees, test fees, and courses. I invested hours on writing essays in both English and Spanish, researching bilingual teaching, meeting several times for interviews with officials. I took two part-time jobs to be able to afford the gas and the fees. I was told this morning that not only my money will not be reimbursed, but that is useless to take the "right" test now because it would be too late for me to be included in the program. So I will not be admitted as a teacher for 09-10. Misinformation and unclear instructions cost me my future livelihood. As simple as pressing the "wrong" button in the computer when I registered for that test one month ago. It is as if they want to get rid of the good candidates, and damn it I am a good candidate fluent in three languages and well versed in history, art and literature. (Please mind my immodesty, but I need to get it out!) I just do not understand. Am I being to naive? Right now I do not know what I am going to do next. Of course, I must look for another job. I am sad, very sad and frustrated. We have become numbers with a long list of check lists trailing behind us, we are being approved or disapproved impersonally.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

31 flavors of ice SCREAM


Some people drink, others smoke, I eat ice cream or rather ice SCREAM. As frustrating days go I had a top ten day today. It is all about a test called the EC-4. It must be some kind of cynical joke to call a trick ridden general examination test for teachers in Texas an EC-anything. It was tough, specially when half-way during the examination I discovered, well it was more of a revelation, that I was taking the wrong test. Let me restate. I WAS TAKING THE WRONG TEST. You see I had take a EC-4 test, so I went on-line and registered for it after paying $125. Today I found out there are two different EC-4 tests. To make matter more confusing I was offered a Bilingual Teaching position pending the passing of the EC-4 test. So I registered for the Bilingual EC-4 test. I think it makes perfect sense, but it doesn't make any sense for them (the school district) because I was suppose to take the Generalist EC-4 test. Nobody told me that, I'm fuming, I will have to take a new test and pay $125 again for the right test. So I'm boiling mad and am eating lots and lots of ice SCREAM, French Vanilla with caramel syrup to be exact. Tomorrow I am calling the parties involved in this most confusing situation to see if I can get credit for the wrong-test-I-didn't-study-for that I took this afternoon. I-could-just-hyphenate-myself-to-death-tonight. But dear Scarlett said it best-"Tomorrow is another day."

Saturday, May 30, 2009

I Once Had A Blog


Or should I say, A blog once had me? After several attempts to come back I'm finally here. I have missed you all. It has been a couple of weeks since I have blogged. I took some time off because I got two part time jobs and I did not have access to the Internet. Now I'm back. These few weeks I have missed your blogs, your passionate, living blogs. So full of joy and energy. I missed something I can only identify as the BEAUTY of blogging. For me, it has to do with sharing your crazy thoughts, searching for beauty (not the obvious harmonious one , but the inner one), letting your brain rage with luminous thunderstorms, and sitting down for coffee and blueberry muffins.
I wanted to come back earlier. I yearned for this little blogging joy. I hope you all have forgiven my absence. I was afraid I would come back and find myself with no followers to play cowboys with. Gladly, that's all over.

News: I am becoming a teacher. So a lot of hard work lies ahead. I'm partly scared and partly thrilled. 75% of the people I have told of my most recent vocation have looked me with sad and baffled eyes. They just do not understand why. A teacher?, Why?, Because.... I just want to stick my tongue out and tell them off. Because I believe. Because I have hopes. Because I refuse to be cynical. Because it is a rare honor and privilege to be a mentor, and educator. Because I care. Because there is joy in learning. Because there is beauty in growth. So grow up. Because I might grow up too.

Summer is here. The Texan sun is glaring. I am moving slow. I'm a bit sluggish with this hot weather but I like the deceleration. I also love having an AC and a cool glass of freshly brewed iced tea in my hand. Make it an ice cold beer better. I will put some Copeland on my iPod and pretend I am riding my horse, Pinko, across the Southern Plains. Here's looking at you fellow bloggers.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

The Flickering Blog



















I'm in the middle of a thunderstorm. So I'll be very brief. For two whole days my blog was nowhere to be seen. I only had access to my account. I could write a new post but I could not see the actual page. Today, I finally see my blog in its entirety. This reminds me of one of those beautiful and complicated sand mandalas done by Tibetan monks. After they finish their work they destroy the whole mandala. It is a lesson about impermanence. A blog is also impermanent. I'm glad I got it back. But there are no guarantees. One post at a time. It has been a little exercise on non-attachment. Thanks to my darling bloggers for letting me know that they were able to see the blog. I send you all my pink love.

Friday, May 1, 2009

All is gone. Where is my blog?

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Walking

















New sign at the Pink Ranch


I started walking again today. It's just amazing how exercise clears your mind from all the clutter we have absorbed from our daily lives interactions. Today, as I walked, I saw so many roses I felt I was in some kind of paradise. I could smell the scent as I walked briskly passed them. I have been noticing how everything is so green in North Texas. It is truly a feast for the eyes. It is so simple to go for a brisk walk down your neighborhood. Yet we find one million excuses not to do it. We know is good for the body, the mind and the spirit. But so often we are so easily distracted by petty things. We just put doing exercise at the bottom of our Things To Do list. It not only relieves stress. Walking makes you find a physical and emotional place within a community. Walking "dis-isolates" you. You are part of the whole organism of community once again. As I walk I do positive affirmations (Is this a redundancy?). I am so grateful that all my six senses are functioning. I remember reading Emerson and Thoreau and their deep felt joy and wonder while talking walks. I am going to check out those books again at the library. They are so articulate in defining our humanity and its relation with nature. Walking is an effective antidote for stress. I'm walking again this afternoon. Who knows? I might find new treks, new trees to hug or new ideas.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Absit Omen













Dearest bloggers. I have been very busy lately in my job search. I just wanted to stop by my own blog and tell you how much I appreciate your visits. My mind is running amok these days with thousands of ideas. I am also a little bit obsessed with twitter, which I joined recently, and feel like writing senseless haiku in less than 140 words every 3 hours. Another obsession: Every day I wake up I go to Wikipedia to check on Recent Deaths. It's a little bit morbid. Strangely enough when I find the name of a celebrity (usually actors or actresses of note) in the death lists my heart misses a beat and I feel melancholic. Then, I miss the celebrity terribly and look for info all over the Net. I think I am going to laugh about this little obsession of mine. Am I turning into my own parents? Later in life they loved to read the obituaries to see if any of their friends or acquaintances passed away. Maybe it made them feel like survivors. In the meantime I hope I don't find myself ever on those dreary lists. Absit Omen.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Movie Review: The Edge of Love



I went to see The Edge of Love last Thursday at Angelika Film Centre in Dallas. The movie deals with the relationship among Thomas Dylan, the celebrated Welsh poet, his wife and a lover-friend of his. Typical love triangle. But the director went berserk trying to use all available camera shots. The film is more an anthology of different styles of filming than a coherent story about an intense love relationship during WWII in London. In matter of an hour you get to see wide angles, soft angles, kaleidoscopic lenses swirling around, intense close-ups, off-focus, blurs, light outbursts, chiaroscuro techniques, low-angle shots (from below), you name it. They all come in rapid secession without adding anything to the movie. The two actresses, Kaira Knightly and Sienna Miller play the lover and the wife respectively. They do a good job. They are absorbed into their characters and give good straight performances. I expected the role of Thomas Dylan, played by Matthew Rhys, to be more prominent and to offer more insight into his inner demons so to speak. I would not call this film a failure, it is fairly well acted but it fails to rise to the occasion. The films wants to project an intense expressionistic view of love in times of war. The abrupt changes in different types of camera shots is too distracting. It has some redeeming shots though. My favorite is the opening scene where Kaira Knightly is singing a lush tropical ballad in the middle of a German bombardment in a London Underground station. All in all, I did not enjoy it very much. Of course, this is only my most humble opinion.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Pasta Day


It's been a pasta day. Going to the supermarket to buy all the ingredients for my world famous Alfredo sauce. OK it's really Ragu. But an enhanced Ragu at that. I added mushrooms, parsley and my favorite spice ever tarragon. I wish I had a big kitchen and a budget to prepare my favorite recipes. These "between jobs" days call for ready-made inexpensive food. But my heart is in an open market where I can buy fresh produce and breathe in the colors and scents of the fruits of the earth. How poetic! but true. I love those almost stereotypical scenes in movies filmed in Italy. Long old wooden tables with an array of Mediterranean delicacies. Friends and families eating and laughing and choking. OK, leave the choking part out. Do you guys feel the same way about cooking pasta? Now If I have a glass of Chianti in my hands while cooking, then the meal acquires a sublime quality.

I just found out about the earthquake in L'Aquila in central Italy. Those beautiful Italian Renaissance buildings reduced to ruins. It seems that hundred of people have perished. The first thing I thought was that earthquakes do not discriminate. We are so used to hearing about natural disasters in poor and developing countries. But it can happen anywhere, of course. So my heart and my prayers go to those unfortunate people that are left homeless and have lost family members. I'll have my pasta in silence, I do not care to celebrate that much after these terrible news.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Hi, I Have No Name For This Post


For some strange reason I have had difficulty blogging this week. It's a sort of mental hyperventilation. I want to write about Victorian England, Jorge Luis Borges, a visit to IKEA, my own Caribbean experience, my favorite operas, Balenciaga, orange fruits and vegetables, Route 66, Anglo-Norman kings, Ancient Greece and onomatopoeia as a social phenomenon, just to name a few. I've sat down in front of the computer three times to no avail. I have blogger's block.

In cases like this I become silly...ok, goofy in order to melt away the iceberg found in my paralytic mind.


Beetles I Like:

1.Eudicella gralli
2.Trogodendron fasciculatum
3.Acilius sulcatus
4.Ringo Starr
5.Melolontha hippocastani

Favorite songs to hear while I'm driving away from the city:


1. Top of the World- The Carpenters
2. Proud Mary- CCR
3. Driving My Life Away- Eddie Rabbit
4. The Hampster Dance Song- I Have No Idea Who Plays It?
5. Love Is A Many-Splendored Thing- The Four Aces
Favorite anything:

1. Marimekko prints
2. The Palatine Uvula
3. Cuban Timbales Drums
4. Polish Tatra Mountains wooden boxes
5. Macaroni and Cheese

That felt good, nothing like nonsense to rekindle the blogger's soul. Do I hear Chicken Soup for the Blogger's Soul? Please make your contributions in the form of advise to help me overcome this blogger's block.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Shhh, There Is An Orange On Stage




I just ate an orange. So sweet and juicy. I love smelling the peel, it has the scent of springtime. A quiet simple moment. Quiet is what I need. I am, generally speaking, a soft person. Some say I think too much and that I am too idealistic. All through my adult life I hated that harsh judgement on me. I may be MORE idealistic than some, but I am not TOO idealistic. It's a matter of degrees. I was fired Monday morning from my temporary job scoring English compositions. I failed to pass three surprise validation tests. It's ok, it is not the end of the world. But I must say something about the experience.


Such coldness in hiring and dismissing people. I was translated into a percentage number. I did not survive on account of my under 65% number. I will keep on looking for a new job. I am considering becoming a teacher. It will definitely lift me from poverty. But I know first hand the challenges that it would bring. Being a teacher is not an easy job. Teaching will not make any sense if you are not committed to it. Burnout is a reality. In my last teaching job I broke my voice 7 times during the Academic year and had a bout with bronchitis. Still I believe that we can improve our lives through education. Education is the true equalizer among us. Everyone should be given the opportunity of Education. In this I firmly believe.


So I'll keep you posted on that one.




In the meantime, a hot bath, poetry, and oranges.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Gods and Heroes


"... black-winged night,
into the bosom of Erebus dark and deepLaid a wind-born egg, and as the season rolledForth sprang Love, the longed-for, shinning with
wings of gold."

The Birds, Aristophanes (circa 446-386 B.C.E.)


The wind is blowing fiercely outside and the temperature has dipped into the 30's. I decided to stay home and warm up with a cup of coffee and a book I recently took out from the library. The book, Mythology by Edith Hamilton (1867-1963), was one of my favorite books growing up in the balmy Caribbean. Even though my island was thousands of miles away from the Aegean Sea I could see war clad heroes and immortal gods roaming about the rugged acantilados (sea cliffs) of Borinquen (PuertoRico).


I was a sick child. Bedridden by asthma I took to reading from an early age in order to placate my anxiety. My father lost his first child in Spain due to a very negligent medical system. He was overcautious about any of his children's health issues. I perceived his deep anxiety every time he saw me gasping for air and crying in fear that I might die. Asthma was an existential affair to me. At only six or seven years old I could feel the mayhem I was causing in my home. I was the center of attention because I had to be taken care of and monitored. I vividly remember my father injecting Adrenaline into my arm at 3 o'clock in the morning. My lips had a purplish undertone due to the lack of oxygen. Back then, the 60's, there was limited knowledge on the condition. My Catalonian grandmother, Abita, would sit next to my bed giving me chest rubs with alcoholado (bay rum) filled with eucalyptus leaves. She would pray to the Holy Infant of Prague for my survival. Those prayers still inhabit my soul. They were tender, heartfelt prayers. In moments of fear and panic in my life I go deep inside and connect with the deep vibrating sounds of Abita's husky voice.

One day my father brought me three gigantic books with very colorful illustrations. One of the books was the The Iliad. I was captivated by the stories in that book. I saw myself in them on account that my name is Hector like the Trojan warrior prince. I read about the capricious gods and combatant mortals. From my bed I imagined the real world to be a n heroic saga. These stories whetted my appetite for creativity and critical thinking. The Greek myths are, simply put, lessons in human ethics. A child that learns about the gifts of antiquity in the form of literature and art is a child that realizes that he or she is a vital cultural descendant of those marvelous people that gave us civilization. Zeus, Dionysus, Demeter, Odysseus, the Muses and Medusa the Gorgon stand for the complexity and meaning of our innermost human traits. Love, triumph, defeat, betrayal, happiness and sorrow among them. In our present world we have forgotten our past. We are very much disconnected from the glory and richness of the Ancient World.

This stormy day I feel fragile and a bit distant from the insane speed of our society and the bumpy roads of modernity. I feel reduced to a number (read NUMBer). This is contrary to my spirit. Those readings about gods and heroes give me strength for I know I am the son of their triumphs. I am not longer isolated from my humanity. I am of a race (Human race) that emerged from vicissitude and need. Metaphors are necessary for this voyage. Symbols are important roadsigns. They keep you guided. Symbols clarify the reasons for our longings and infuse our understanding with the vibrancy of life itself. Let the wind blow so I may take refuge in an otherworldly Theban cave where the lyre merrily sings Sapphic poetry of Love and courageous heroes set aside their glimmering helmets for the luminosity of the glowing fire of our human adventure.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Old is Beautiful


I am looking forward to growing old. Very, very old. I would love to see how the little hair I have left turns white. I think it will complement my skin tone and my eyes. I want to look like Gandalf from Lord of the Rings. I wonder if my hands will look like my Basque grandfather ancient hands; brittle and spotted; gentle and warm. I hope I get lots of wrinkles, seriously. You see I love maps and I would like to wear one in my face. Imagine a continent full of bays and peninsulas drawn in your forehead, just gorgeous. By then I would have accumulated hundreds upon hundreds of personal anecdotes. I will soon become a great conversationalist. And I will not be agitated or mortified by hasty people or desperate circumstances because I will be totally convinced that Love conquers all. I think of old age as an elegant waltz full of joy and enchantment.


I have been always fascinated by old people. They are walking encyclopedias of the human experience. Being surrounded my old people enriches my life. I am deeply grateful for them.